Half Binary

Meet Daisy "Daises With Wolves" McGais

2011-02-15T15:22:00.003-06:00

This is Daisy. She is my dog. She would like to smother you in cuteness.

For those that know me, and know me pretty well, this should come as a surprise. Maybe it's because I've been a cat person since I can remember, or maybe it's because I'm a clean freak, or maybe it's because I told my wife I wouldn't get a dog until we got a house. It turns out, it's very difficult to just go "window shopping" for a dog when you get to reach into the window and hold them. So now I have a cute, sweet, fluffy canine that roams around our condo and shreds paper.

Also, she's a very good excuse to take lots and lots of photos.

It's inadequate, and I like it!

2010-05-19T13:50:00.003-05:00

If you've hung around me any significant length of time, I've probably either corrected you on an incorrect use of words, or I've asked you to clarify an ambiguous statement. For instance, the statement, "That was a cheap shirt!" can mean A) the shirt was inexpensive, B) the shirt was poorly made, or C) both. If I'm thinking about buying the shirt, I want to know if it's A, B, or C.

However, despite my best efforts to ensure people make clear, correct statements, the English language is fundamentally flawed. It is inadequate as a vehicle for perfectly explicit communication. The crazy thing is: I love it. Here's a stupid joke:

A carrot walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve food here."

This joke is only possible because English, like any language, has words that are allowed multiple meanings. Or how about this terrible joke:

A string walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve strings here." So the string leaves the bar, and goes crazy: convulsing, twisting, and rubbing himself all over the ground. He then walks back into the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "Hey, aren't you that string I just told to get lost?" And the string says, "No, I'm a frayed knot."

This joke works because of those annoying little things we learned about in grade school called "homophones."

Our world would be a dull place without our language's pitfalls of ambiguity, even if it means I still don't know if I should buy that cheap shirt or not.

Missing greatest hits

2010-03-26T16:43:00.004-05:00

I have a pet peeve. There's little to nothing I can do about it, but it's there. I hate when an artist has multiple "Greatest Hits" albums, but none of them have all of the hits I want. The latest culprit: Alice Cooper.

The three songs I want together are: "School's Out", "Love's A Loaded Gun", and "Poison." After a long time searching, I found 1 double-disc set that had studio versions of all 3 songs. But guess what? It's from an bootleg Russian label! Doesn't exactly feel right buying it, and as it is, there's only one pricey copy available that I can find.

Sure, one might think "maybe he's got so many hits, you can't fit them all on one CD!" And you'd have a good point, if it weren't for the fact that there's a 4-disc set that has lots of his songs I've never heard of, but completely omits "Love's A Loaded Gun," which was even released as a single.

And then you might counter with, "but perhaps that collection was on a different label than the original album, and they couldn't get the rights." Usually a very valid (but annoying) point, but then why are other songs from the same album (specifically, "Hey Stoopid") on the compilation?

If feels stupid to buy two different "best of" albums to get all 3 songs (hello redundancy!), so if I enjoy the rest of his music enough, I'll likely buy the 3 original albums they came on, or I'll sit this one out (la, la, la, I can't hear you, Mr. Digital Downloads).

To note: For the record, I had a similar issue with Salt N Pepa, and I bought all the albums, and it turns out I really liked all of their stuff. Here's hoping I luck out again.

A life update

2010-03-26T16:19:00.002-05:00

A lot has happened in my life that I probably could have blogged about in a more timely manner, but I didn't. Therefore, I'm going to do a terrible job of summarizing the last few months in hopes that it will at least let me feel like I can post about new things. Right now, I feel like I can't update until I post about Thanksgiving.

So let's start there. I got to co-host my very first Thanksgiving! D and I decided to start our own traditions. We love themes, and this year's theme was: "Taste Test." We had two of nearly everything. Two main dishes (traditional turkey VS tofu), two cranberry sauces, two pies, etc. It was great. Next year? Who knows! Maybe my sister will host it in NYC?

Next up, I went on my first cruise. 8 days in the Caribbean! Seriously amazing. I had a great time getting to see a part of the world I've never been near. Just me and my girlfriend's entire family.

That reminds me, I also got myself engaged. The girlfriend in the previous paragraph? Now she's my fiancee! Honestly, I never realized just how crazy our courting rituals are until I had to propose. The whole ordeal was fun, scary, and completely nuts. But in the end, every bit of nerves, and every penny spent, was all completely worth it. I love you, D.

Now I get to plan for a wedding.

I know I've left out a lot, and I'm a little sorry I did, but less sorry than trying to write 6 post-dated blog posts, or never starting this blog back up. Thanks for playing catch-up with me. See you next post.

The fine art of calligraphy

2009-12-08T13:13:00.002-06:00

I've always enjoyed typography. It's been something I've been enamored with since I was a teen. There's something about the order placed on the chaotic curves and strokes of our alphabet that I find attractive.

Recently, I took a beginner's calligraphy course. Although it's admittedly tedious work, I don't know the last time I enjoyed a class this much! Getting to not only learn the strokes, but being able to actually create beautiful letter-forms on my own was truly exciting! My years of looking at typefaces and trying to eke out what pen strokes were needed to create it were finally validated. I got to see first-hand how it all worked together.

The knowledge I've gained has inspired me to work harder on my lettering and learn new scripts and, of course, share this joy with others (get ready for fancy birthday cards, everybody!).

There are few better feelings than the feeling of learning about something you love. I would highly recommend finding a community education course that excites you. You never know what sort of wonderful experiences you might have.

"Oh that's what he meant! Stars above!"

2009-08-12T12:36:00.003-05:00

Last night Debra and I took a rambling road trip up north to try to see The Perseids. After about 45 minutes of trying to find nowhere, I finally pulled off onto the side roads and found a nice dirt driveway to park in. We only spotted two meteors, but there was just so much more to the evening than flaming bits of rock.

In my effort to find a dark location relatively close to downtown, I started taking a critical look at what is known as "light pollution." Sure, I'd seen abnormally bright patches of night sky near sports fields before, and I understand what light pollution is, but it's never really seemed like problem. However, attempting to really see all that can be seen in the night sky suddenly becomes a problem when every couple of miles there's another town, another overly-bright gas station, more billboards, more and more civilization. Making the trip really gave me a reason to appreciate the stars we did manage to see.

And what seeing we did. Even knowing that there was so much to the sky that we were missing, there's something really magical about all the little points of light hanging up there in the blue-black sky. It's easy to get lost in the stars just taking a peek upwards. Staring off into the depths of space is something most city dwellers, and even most suburb dwellers don't get to do very often.

I encourage everyone to go out and appreciate the vast wonders of our night sky. You might suddenly feel a little connection to the grand stories from eons ago. I know I did.

Striking a busy balance

2009-08-11T16:22:00.002-05:00

For a long time, I've wanted to have a schedule that was filled with fun things to do. I always envied people who seemed to know all these exciting people, and had exciting events to go to.

Recently, I've become (to a certain, nerdy degree) one of those people. I've got a great group of friends, and I'm keeping myself involved in the local art community. I love going to gallery openings and trying new restaurants with friends. It's pretty much all it's cracked up to be.

Until, like the mighty bamboo, things start overgrowing the boundaries of my calendar. Suddenly, I've got a friend's birthday, and a trip, and an event, and it's all at the same time. And being able to plan a weekend? I'm booked for months.

I know a balance must be struck, but I enjoy all the individual events. What is a busy boy to do?

I call upon the blagonet! Tell me, what do you do when life gets too exciting to do everything?

I keep forgetting I'm living in the future

2009-07-14T09:36:00.003-05:00

I love to keep up with tech news, and one of the most exciting things about it is reading all of the up-coming release dates for fun, new products. However, recently I've been finding that the release dates seem very far off in the future. Years off. And then I realize that the year 2010 is next year. Heck, it's only a few months away.

I think I need a sign at the foot of my bed that tells me I'm living in the future, so every morning I'll remember.

My Quiet Riot crossover post

2009-06-25T12:30:00.004-05:00

For those who actually read my other blog, this will seem a bit familiar.

I was recently given a wonderful gift. A gift of music. Specifically Quiet Riot's album: Metal Health. I'll be honest here: I wasn't as impressed as I had hoped, upon my first listen. Sure, who can resist the album's two hit singles, "Metal Health" and "Cum On Feel The Noize"? But the rest of the album just felt either a little soft or a little hokey or both.

Well, it's weeks later, and I still can't stop listening. I've entirely fallen in love with the album. I don't have a good explanation for my change in feelings, but it is what it is. If you like classic 80's metal, and you haven't given Quiet Riot a chance yet, I strongly urge you to pick up Metal Health and bang your head.

Skulls and birds and guitars, oh my!

2009-06-04T14:40:00.002-05:00

A few months ago, my buddy over at St Awesome came up with a frightfully accurate portrayal of Target men's t-shirts. His theory was that nearly every shirt contained at least a skull, bird, or guitar. For a while, it was a fun game to play when visiting Target; there was a plethora of shirts that fit the description. Now, times are a'changin'.

Taking a look at Target's current line-up, I'd have to say trees are starting to become the new guitar. They both have similar shapes, so it seems a logical step.

I wonder if they have the missing link t-shirt: a tree in the shape of a guitar!

The age of the fleeting standard

2009-05-29T09:34:00.002-05:00

Recently, the HDMI Founders group released HDMI 1.4. For those of you who are not familiar with what HDMI is, it's a specification for connecting A/V devices. In fact, that's what makes it special: it's a single cable that can transport both audio and video at the same time. In theory, this is a wonderful new thing, but there's information unsaid so far that might color this rosy picture.

To fully grasp why I have such issues with this new spec, let's travel back in time a bit. Right now, we're in the 1940s. A company called RCA has introduced a fancy new connector call the phono plug. It's a neat way to connect your phonograph to your amplifier. One, simple, sturdy, cable. All it does it transport a single audio channel.

Now, let's hop on over a few years to when stereo records became popular. The little cable that was so elegant in design is now doubled, and we have one for left and one for right. That's it.

A few decades later, we hit the end of the 1970s. Suddenly, there's a reason to upgrade your audio equipment and video equipment. The laserdisc has brought 5.1 surround sound to the home, and composite video has enabled people to connect video devices without all the static and fuss that came from the RF (radio frequency) connector. But not to worry, your collection of phono plug cables still works. That simple cable is used for everything you want to connect. Even when digital audio is introduced in the 1980s, that same cable can be used to transport that too.

It's not until the end of the 1980s that we see a new type of cable: the mini-DIN, or s-video cable. It provides a cleaner picture over the composite video that was being sent over our phono plug. Due to the nature of TV technology at the time, most people didn't bother with the new-fangled connector until the mid to late 1990s, and by then a new video standard was created called component video, that used, you guessed it: the phono plug!

Let's pause here in time. By the mid 1990s a home A/V setup could have 9 phono plugs between A/V devices. 6 for 5.1 surround and 3 for component video. Gosh, it's great that we can reuse that little connector, but it's a rat's nest back there! Let's reduce the clutter by replacing our 5.1 analog with some crisp, clean digital surround sound, using either a single phono plug, or a fancy fiber-optic cable.

Digital is great, but now it seems that some of my components use coax (the phono plug) and some use TosLink (the fiber optical), despite both being the same digital signal. Now I've got to make sure all my components talk with the same standards.

This setup was great for about 10 years. Then a great, new technology came to us: HDTV. High Definition. Thankfully, our good, old phono plug cables are here; we can use them to get nearly pixel perfect HDTV. But digital is perfect, and we only want one cable, not three.

So in 2003 the HDMI specification was born. A standard that could be used to connect your A/V equipment together using just one, thin, little cable. But it was only version 1.0.

One year later, they released version 1.1. This time you could have more types of audio over the cable. We've gone from a new standard every decade or so, to an update every year. Thankfully, we only need to upgrade our TV, receiver, and Blu-Ray player to get the new features, we can keep our old HDMI cable.

Now, in 2009, after 8 revisions on the "standard" (including 1.3b1), they've released version 1.4. Except this time, after we buy a new TV, receiver, and Blu-Ray player, we need to buy a new HDMI cable. But which one?

Wait: multiple cables? But I thought HDMI was supposed to be the end-all-be-all of standards? Where before we had a single cable that could do 1080p/60 (that's 1080 lines of a progressively scanned image at 60 frames per second) and DTS-HD Master Audio (that's 7.1 channel audio that sounds just like your local multiplex), we now have 5 different cables that all support different things.

The HDMI Founders group has now given us:

Standard HDMI Cable – supports data rates up to 1080i/60;
High Speed HDMI Cable – supports data rates beyond 1080p, including Deep Color and all 3D formats of the new 1.4 specification;
Standard HDMI Cable with Ethernet – includes Ethernet connectivity;
High Speed HDMI Cable with Ethernet – includes Ethernet connectivity;
Automotive HDMI Cable – allows the connection of external HDMI-enabled devices to an in-vehicle HDMI device.

The above is taken from here.

I'll ignore the automotive standard for this discussion, but let's focus on why the other four cables are a problem. The biggest issue here is instead of giving the consumer more, they're effectively hurting the consumer by giving manufactureres the option of only providing support for connecting the "standard" HDMI cable v1.4. If the press is to be believed, they've cut off the maximum video output at 1080i/60 (this means there are 1080 interlaced lines to the image, which is not as good as progressive), where as before we had 1080p/60. To continue to get your 1080p/60 fix, you need to ensure everything supports HDMI 1.4 "High Speed." Which brings me to the next problem, if we need a new cable as it is, just always give us Ethernet too. The cost of manufacturing the highest end cable is negligable. If the consumer chooses to buy a lower-end receiver now, that consumer shouldn't have to worry about replacing anything but the receiver later. But this way they not only buy a new receiver, but new cables too, all in the name of HDMI.

Why have we gone from a new interconnect every 10 or more years, to effectively a new one every year? Part of it has to do with the rapid pace of technology, but part of it - and I feel the driving force behind the HDMI Founders group's decision - is greed. HDMI Founders gets a licensing fee for each cable that is produced. What better way to increase revenue than by multiplying that license 5 times? Consumers may never have the luxury of buying a home theater setup that stays fresh for 10 years ever again, but they don't need anyone making it any more difficult.

My childhood gaming experience

2009-05-20T18:55:00.004-05:00

I'm not usually one to post other people's work and call it a day, but this Penny Arcade strip really sums up being on the Sega side of the console wars back in the day. Except I've played Punch Out.

Note: I don't know what Penny Arcade's policies are on image leaching like this, so if you represent them and would like me to kill this, please contact me, I would be happy to comply with your wishes.

Why we should all keep the mix tape alive

2009-05-14T13:35:00.002-05:00

If you're a product of the 80's or even most of the 90's you should be familiar with the concept of the mix tape. But for those who are unfamiliar, a quick rundown: a mix tape is an audio cassette filled with music from a variety of artists chosen by the mix tape maker for the mix tape listener.

As we've abandoned the audio cassette for the CD and now the CD for the mp3, we've started to lose the wonderful benefit of the mix tape. It's a way of introducing someone else to new music that you like. I'm sure some of you out there are thinking "this is what Pandora is for," but you'd be wrong.

The mix tape has a unique property. Things like Pandora try to find you new music that you like, but it's based on music you already know you like. The mix tape is hand-picked by someone else with no guarantee that the intent is to bring you music you like. They can often be filled with music you just don't care for, but that's the beauty! Say you give it a listen and you find yourself annoyed by the music, but then you think, "golly, my friend couldn't have that poor taste in music, I'll try it again." Perhaps this time you find yourself nodding your head to a couple of songs. Intrigued, you give it another listen. And another. And eventually you've realized that you like some of the music.

So now you think, "hey, if I like their music, maybe they'll like mine!" Now you get the wonderful chance to do something different with your music. Instead of just putting on any old album, or letting your computer shuffle things for you, you're now an active participant in your music collection. Now you're going over all of your tracks searching, listening, thinking, trying to find the perfect match. When you're done not only have you created a great new mix for your friend, but you've taken the time to appreciate the music you've got.

When all is said and done, two people have not only introduced each other to new music, but they've re-introduced themselves to their own music.

Whether it's on a cassette, CD, or flash drive, give a mix tape to a friend, and keep alive this wonderful experience.

Myth Understood

2009-05-06T11:04:00.001-05:00

Here's a great myth: only old people don't understand computers.

Everyone talks about how young people just "get" computers and old people are sooo clueless. Well, guess what: young people have just as much trouble getting around their computers. It's all a matter of self-involvement. I've worked with people younger than I, people who grew up in this fancy computer age, who can't seem to grasp how copy and paste work.

If my 80 year-old aunt can learn the very basics of Windows (yes, we bought her her first computer at 80, what?), it's possible there are 10 year olds waking around not knowing that there's other ways to get places on the internet than through their home page search box.

Don't blindly discriminate. This has been a public service announcement from your local guy-who-keeps-an-online-journal.

Note: this entry was originally written 4/25/08, but sat around in my Drafts for over a year.

Beating the digital music stores

2009-05-04T11:26:00.002-05:00

Although I'm a fan of technology, for some reason I've never embraced purchasing digital music downloads. There's something I love about having the CD that is exciting to me. But since nearly everyone I know has started buying music on-line (especially from the iTMS), I've started having a contest with myself: can I beat the iTMS pricing?

If we assume that each song is worth $1 and each full album is worth $10, an album with 2 hit singles on it needs to be $2 or less, or if I buy an album for $10, I should love every song on it. This makes buying new CDs very exciting. Some people like to bargain hunt for shoes, I do it for music.

I've found there are some very good benefits to buying music the way I do.

I'm not spending more money than my friends would on the same music.
I don't buy willy-nilly because most CDs are too expensive under my rules.
There's the chance I'll like more songs than I expected on an album, making my purchase a virtual profit.
Despite the progress made on iTMS, CDs still give you lossless tracks, full album art, and credits.
When my mp3 player runs out of batteries, I can pop in a CD and still enjoy my music.
If a friend wants to borrow an album, I can grab the CD and lend it to them without having to turn on my computer, or transfer files, or anything.
If my digtial copy gets corrupted, I've got a lossless backup.
I never have to worry if my files are in the right format for a certain player, or in any other format at all.

Although I know the RIAA would frown heavily on my purchasing used CDs and then ripping them to mp3s, I'd like them to know I do break my rules sometimes and buy new, full-priced albums. I'm willing to spend full price on a new CD at a concert. Great musicians should be rewarded for their hard work, and I feel that buying a ticket to their show and buying merchandice when you're there is the best thing you can do for them. Even if you go to their show and download the songs on your iPhone as they are played at the concert, at the end of the night, you're still paying a third party for their music, and you still can't have the band sign the cover.

A note: I'm sorry for singling out Apple, but they are currently the dominant venue for digital music downloads and music players. The same thoughts and rules apply to all digital music stores.

Food photography is hard, hand-held food photography is impossible

2009-04-19T11:03:00.003-05:00

During a very delicious dinner recently, I decided to try my hand at food photography. I'd heard it is very difficult to do, especially as a professional with hot lights. It seems that once you get a pleasing looking composition, then your food is reflecting light in an unpleasing way. Despite this challenge, I decided to do it anyhow, because practice is always good, right? Well, I didn't have my tripod on me so I had to do the shots hand-held.

Hand-held indoor photography is also a difficult task due to generally poor lighting, and the combination of trying to get the food to look good and to keep my hands from shaking too much, I only ended up with one sorta okay photo out of about 12. Above you can see the final result.

Recipes for the lazy or: Magic Shell is a ripoff

2009-04-11T11:08:00.002-05:00

Here's how to make your own Magic Shell chocolate ice cream topper and chocolate fruit shell:
Ingredients: chocolate chips.

Instructions:
Take a small pot, fill half with water.
When water boils, place glass mixing bowl on top.
Drop a few chocolate chips into bowl.
When chips start to melt, start stirring with spatula.
Continue to stir and drop chips in until you've got a nice sized pool o' chocolate.
Use liquid chocolate to cover fruit, ice cream, or whatever.
Never buy Magic Shell again.

It's almost embarrassingly easy to do. The best bit is you can use your favorite chocolate, not just whatever Smucker's wants to give you (no offense to Smuckers, please don't sue me).

So guys: impress your next date by looking like you can cook! Just don't try to cover your date in chocolate, unless she's into 2nd degree burns.

WTFicide

2009-02-04T12:30:00.002-06:00

WTFicide: when something breaks due to unexpected input. My open source word processor committed WTFicide when I tried to load a new Word document.

Coined by "Baeocystin" of Ars Technica.

Batman (1989) revisited

2008-12-11T09:36:00.003-06:00

A certain song ("Another Man's Rhubarb" -Pop Will Eat Itself) reminded me of the 1989 Batman movie. Having not seen it for about 8 years I decided to take a look at the IMDB quotes page for the film. Many have compared and contrasted Joker from the 1989 film and the 2008 film, and the general consensus is that the 2008 Joker better captures the essence of the character.

I can easily agree that the whole Jack Napier backstory in the '89 film is a terrible departure from the origin-less Joker of the comics. Joker is a great character because he is more important as a metaphore than as a villain. Clearly, this is what the '08 film hammered in again and again. But where I feel that Joker fell short was living up to his name, and this is where the script for the '89 Batman film really shines. The '89 Joker has a real zest for life. He just wants to have fun...at the expense of others' lives. You get the feeling that Batman is like a stern parent to a hyperactive child. I love this Joker, because the Joker metaphore is there, but it's subtle. He is both portrayed as the antithesis of Batman and his equal without hitting the viewer on the head with the idea.

The real issue at hand, I feel, is not that the '89 Joker is a poor joker (ignoring the origin story), but that Jack Nicholson was a poor choice. The criticism suggests that we weren't watching Joker but Jack. Although I think he's an excellent fit for the character, I can see the critics' point. To those critics, I say: read the script and invision your choice of Joker, and maybe you too can enjoy my favorite Joker.

I can admit it now: I love Goo.

2008-11-19T15:15:00.003-06:00

I recently started playing a wonderful new game. It's got charm and wit and it's a fun challenge, but never so hard that I want to stop. It's called:

World Of Goo

It's a physics-based puzzle game in which you must construct structures with goo balls in an effort to to get as many goo balls as you can into a pipe. The graphics a smooth and simple, the music rivals some movie scores (reminds me a little of Danny Elfman at times), and the game-play is a pleasure.

Go, get dirty.

Lies he has told

2008-11-14T14:54:00.002-06:00

I'm not usually one for just linking to people's blogs in my blog, because it just helps invalidate the existence of my blog, but to those who do read my blog, but neglect Primate Brow Flash, please take a moment and read this entry: Lies I have told.

My Halloween Movie Script

2008-10-28T11:03:00.003-05:00

For your enjoyment, I've written a short screenplay entitled: MissDial. The tag line is "They Missed By One Number."

Cast:
Woman: beautiful brunette in early 20's, has soft voice
Man on phone: has raspy voice

[INTERIOR: Dimly lit living room]

Phone rings.

W:Hello?

Man on phone coughs.

W:Hello?
M:Hello.
W:Can I help you?
M:Susan?
W:No, I'm sorry, you must have the wrong number.
M:I don't think so.
W:Well, there's no Susan here.
M:Is this 555-2415?
W:No, it's 555-2416.

We hear the man hangup abruptly.
Cut to black. Roll credits.

Economic stimulus gifting

2008-10-21T10:32:00.004-05:00

These days, it's easy to travel all the way to your local Amazon.com and buy your friend a birthday gift of the latest Eddie Murphy flop on DVD. You can even send it to him directly. Heck, you can even include a nice note, saying how much you appreciate him as a friend. But really, a kick in the shins and passing him a twenty next time you see him would do just as well.

In these trying economic times we need to be sure that what we're spending our hard earned money on is worthwhile. So why not redirect that money towards a gift that not only means something (besides showing your poor taste in films), but is beneficial to our economy?

Instead of trekking all the way to Amazon.com, type in fewer letters and go to Etsy.com. There you can find a wide range of handmade goods that can be shipped directly to your friend, and to top it off, you're sending that money to a disgruntled artisan who will be happy to drown their sorrows in booze and more art supplies, thus directly stimulating our economy.

So next time you have the urge to share with your best friend the delights of a man in a lady's fat suit, think again, and buy them something unique that will not show them how little you know about quality movie-making. And when you're done, you can sit back in your chair and imagine your new favorite artist running out and buying one bottle of paint and six bottles of beer.

Excuse me, I have to go rewind my VHS of The Klumps.

I'm A Conspirator!

2008-10-03T08:58:00.003-05:00

Last night I went to my very first International Cartoonist Conspiracy meeting. The ICC meets at various locations once a month and does a comic jam. Despite what you might have heard, this does not involve cutting up comics, adding pectin, cooking and jarring. Instead, each person gets one blank (but numbered) page. A theme is decided upon, and each person creates the first panel on that page. Then the pages are passed around, each person continuing the story on that page. The final panel(s) must be linked to the next page's first panel, thus creating one (theoretically) coherent comic at the end of the night!

The Minneapolis branch is a great group of people to work with. They meet the first Thursday of each month at Diamonds Coffee Shoppe in Minneapolis at 6:30pm. It's a great time, anyone can participate, and they do NOT require you to be good at drawing or writing. Just bring your creative juices (and fruit pectin).

Side note: I've been informed that last night's comic will be part of a gallery show at Altered Esthetics called "Happy Holidaze" which will run Dec 4-20th.

Trying on other peoples' shoes

2008-08-29T08:50:00.003-05:00

It's true: you can never really know what it's like for someone until you're (metaphorically) standing in their shoes.

Nothing says class like a nylon track suit and a tie

2008-08-28T10:23:00.001-05:00

Feel free to replace the tie with a bolo or ascot.

Name/Job correlation?

2008-08-13T13:22:00.002-05:00

My mother likes to joke that everyone in IT is named Dave. As it turns out, I've never worked with anyone named Dave. Not in IT, not outside of IT that I can remember.

However, I've found that working in the financial sector I'm currently working in the same office as 6 Michaels. There are a total of 7 in the company. Does working in finance attract people of a certain name? Are there other jobs that seem to attract more of one name than others?

Maybe there's just an over-abundance of Michaels in the area.

Feeling poor? Just convert a 5 dollar bill into Zimbabwe Dollars

2008-07-21T17:24:00.002-05:00

Right now, the Zimbabwe Dollar is worth a whopping 0.00000000005353 USD. So go ahead and exchange some of your money, heck, even a penny, for millions of Zimbabwe Dollars!

And for some delightfully depressing reading, check out Dr. Gono's statement on the current state of monetary affairs in Zimbabwe. It makes you long for the Weimar Republic!

The (Really, Really) Dark Knight

2008-07-21T11:32:00.002-05:00

I was going to write a long review of The Dark Knight, but since Michael Sragow already wrote it for me, here's a link.

For those who don't want to read the whole thing: it's a good film that's constantly dragged down by being too preachy and serious.

To note: This is not to suggest that the acting, cinematography, or directing was poor, just the script.

New York City?!

2008-07-10T15:53:00.002-05:00

Get the rope.

Actually, get me stuff to do! I'm heading to NYC from July 24th-29th. I'll be hanging out with my sister some of the time, but during work hours on the weekdays I'll likely be on my own. I'm sure I'll go hit all the museums and such, but I want to hear about cool places to go and things to do that are rarely (if ever) in a guidebook.

Lay it on me, while I go get me some Texas salsa.

My perfect cup of coffee at work

2008-07-09T14:09:00.002-05:00

I'll admit it: I'm cheap. If I can get free food, I'll take it. So if I have the choice between free hot coffee and pay-for cold soda, I'll take the coffee. The problem here is that I don't like hot coffee very much. I do, however, love iced coffee.

There are a few ways to make iced coffee, the easiest is to just drop a bunch of ice in a hot cup of joe and be done with it. This is terrible, unless you like weak, diluted coffee.

I take a long, drawn out route, but the results are exactly what I crave (and it's free). Here's how I do it:

1) Pour hot coffee into mug (I prefer less caffeine, so it's half decaf and half regular)
2) Add sugar to taste [optional]
3) Stir the heck out of the coffee while you work until it's cooled
4) Place mug into refrigerator until cold (10 minutes)
5) Place mug into freezer until really cold (5 minutes or so)
6) Enjoy!

Although the entire process takes over an hour (using a nice coffee mug hinders the cooling process a lot), what comes out at the end is a perfectly strong, ice cold cup of coffee.

So tell me, coffee drinkers, what laborious route do you take for your perfect cup of joe?

Yvonne's Original No Streaks Microfiber Cloth

2008-06-27T21:07:00.006-05:00

I recently attended the Back To The 50's car show at the Minnesota State Fair grounds. At one of the vendor booths there was a simple product called "Yvonne's Original No Streaks Microfiber Cloth." They had a plain old window, a bucket of water, and one of their cloths. My father and I tested them. I even had the guy wipe my glasses with them. It appeared that the product worked! We were guaranteed that the product would live up to our expectations, or our money back.

I decided the best test would be on my bathroom mirror. It needed a little cleaning anyhow. I did a thorough cleaning with my trusty sponge. My mirror looked beautiful and streak-free. Then I did a very simple wipe with the cloth (lightly damp, as directed). My mirror looked exactly the same. I wasn't disappointed, but the fact that my sponge was just as good left me feeling like I'd been had.

But that was only part 1 of my experiment.

Part 2 involves the one thing that always kills a beautiful window: fog. Every time I clean my car, I'm always thrilled at the results...until it gets too humid out. Then I can't see anything but streaks. So to simulate this, I closed my bathroom door and started a hot shower. This is really where the truth comes out. My sponged side was the usual, broad, flat strokes of streaks. And Yvonne's Original No Streaks Microfiber Cloth?

Well, I guess you can't call them streaks. But the promise on the package of "spot free" isn't exactly accurate. The way water dries from the cloth wipe is in tiny little specks of water. Each and every one of these comes out when the glass gets foggy.

Was this better or worse then my sponge? That's a good question. Initially, the microfiber side looked like it wasn't even picking up the fog; it was amazing! The space between the specks was clean and clear. As the fog became more dense, the broad, flat streaks from the sponge became evenly covered in moisture, whereas the specks from the microfiber cloth stuck around. In the end, I was more easily able to see myself in the half of the mirror that the sponge had wiped.

The final verdict? Although these cloths are not pope-sanctioned miracles, they do provide ease of use and protection against minor fogging. I'd recommend them to anyone who is looking for a simple solution to cleaning glass, but doesn't need to polish camera lenses for a trip to the rainforest.

Update: I own a professional-grade CRT monitor that has a glass coating on it that's very delicate. This has always been very hard to clean properly, because you can't use anything but water, and even then you don't want to accidentally short the tube. Yvonne's cloth cleaned off all the fingerprints, left the coating intact, and a quick wipe with a cotton cloth made my monitor look like new. It was worth it right there.

Updates: Movies VS Games

2008-05-30T11:50:00.002-05:00

When George Lucas re-released Star Wars, he replaced bad rubber puppets with fancy CGI, added more scenes, and changed others. This led to nerds around the world crying out in anger (much like Darth Vader in Ep III) because the movie from their childhood was modified and thus ruined.

This never happens to video games.

When a game is updated everyone is happy. In fact, most gamers want to see their favorite games updated for the next-gen consoles. Who doesn't want to see the flat, pixel-ridden Mario from Super Mario Bros. changed into a beautifully drawn cartoon Mario? Heck, add in some extra levels too. Why don't we toss in some new enemies while we're at it? As long as Nintendo kept what was good about it (the gameplay), so very few would ever be bothered by the update. And those that were bothered are probably content playing the original anyhow.

What is it that makes video games different? Why do we mourn the loss of our childhood when a movie we liked gets a fresh polish, but cheer when we see a new update come down the pipe for our favorite game?

Getting spun-up on piracy

2008-05-12T14:54:00.003-05:00

Nothing gets me more frustrated than people sticking their fingers in their ears because it's easier to maintain the status quo than to admit they might be wrong and change something. Today's frustration comes from the video gaming industry.

This here is a long-winded article discussing why PC game piracy isn't the real problem. Please take the time to read it. Maybe someone with some clout in the industry will read it and take a stand. If nothing else, perhaps it will help garner enough support in the general populous to get some positive changes made.

Quasihemidemisemiquaver

2008-05-06T12:50:00.003-05:00

Let us welcome the 128th note's full name into our vocabularies. "Billy, do play this group of sixteen quasihemidemisemiquavers; it sounds lovely."

Two heads are better than one

2008-04-18T09:43:00.003-05:00

When two people are paired correctly, pair programming works beautifully. There's always that second set of eyes, The Nodding Dummy, sitting right there with you, ensuring that your stupid, little mistakes are fixed as you write the code.

As opposed to later, when you're busy tearing your hair out, and praying you don't get fired for incompetency.

Movin' on, uh over, to the, uh, west side...

2008-04-02T08:57:00.004-05:00

Well, I'm not quite moving up, nor am I moving east, but I've moved. Or at least my stuff has moved. I'm still settling in ( read: unpacking).

Thanks to all my friends who helped me load and unload and haul furniture, I owe ya one (or two).

Sending a mixed security signal

2008-03-26T10:29:00.003-05:00

I have recently experienced what some might say is a gross security oversight. At a certain company every employee is required to lock all company data in their drawers before leaving for the night. This is obviously to prevent easy theft of non-public material data. There is nothing wrong with this practice.

However, this same company has no policy regarding its paper trash. Most people toss their old printouts in the trash or recycle bin. Yes, those who work with highly sensitive data do shred their printouts. However, the majority of the employees have had little to no security training, and not having a policy regarding sensitive printouts sends a very mixed message about corporate security.

So listen up kids, don't so this, it just makes you vulnerable, and teaches poor security to your employees. Also, it makes security wonks cry. No one wants to see that.

Singing accents

2008-03-07T10:43:00.002-06:00

Does anyone have a good explanation why some people sound like they're from elsewhere when they're singing? AC/DC never sounds Austrailian, Styx sounds British half the time.

Then again, no matter how hard the Scorpions try, they always sound like they're from Germany.

Like vultures to roadkill

2008-02-12T14:03:00.000-06:00

Someone walked out of the conference room next door and said "there's wraps and stuff going to waste in there." First I thought, "no, surely someone must want them." So I waited, but the call of the vulture was too loud. So I asked my neighbor, "did he just say free food?" Upon agreement, we both carefully tiptoed our way over to the room. Like a pair of siblings sneaking downstairs to see what Santa brought, we maed our way to the food.

Lo and behold, there really were wraps! Greedily, we took our spoils and as we were leaving we saw that the news had already traveled far and wide; there were packs of hungry men making their way across the office in search of the fabled carrion.

As I sat at my desk nibbling on my food, I watched the men walk out with their portions, smiling, happy, victorious. Now I know how the vulture feels after devouring the carcass of some large rodent: a little gassy.

The hi-def update

2008-02-11T10:27:00.000-06:00

It appears as though the format war may be coming to an end. HD-DVD looks like it's about to die, and Blu-Ray is still going strong (well, relatively anyway). It's not the side I would have liked to see win, but at least this silly war is nearly over. I just hope HD-DVD concedes Blu-Ray's win soon and allows us to finally get our hi-def on without worrying if it will be the wrong choice.

Ironically, things are not as clear-cut if you want to buy a hi-def TV. As it stands, there are leaps and bounds being made in both the image quality and the display size, as well as the display type. Currently we're seeing LCD and Plasma as what's hot, but OLED and SED are around too, and promise all sorts of good stuff. Even if you stuck with the current image leader, plasma, you'd still be best to hold off. Despite Pioneer creating what's been touted as the best TV ever, they've already shown us that they've got slimmer and better coming in a couple of years. If you're going to spend $6000 on a high-end TV, you'd like it to not be out-dated in 2 years. As far as CRTs go, we've hit the point where it's as good as it gets, I'm curious to see how long it takes for plasma to get there. ...You know, unless SED grows up.

The contractions are getting worse, doct'r

2008-02-01T08:12:00.000-06:00

I just had an IM conversation in which the response to my request for confirmation was:
"Ok, I'll".

This is an amazing use of a contraction. Technically speaking, "I'll" means "I will". Saying "Ok, I will" is a perfectly acceptable response to my request, yet something seems so very wrong about using that contraction there.

Do I think he might do it again? I think he'll.

A corporate competition where everyone loses

2007-11-28T13:50:00.000-06:00

I'll begin by saying that I'm a big supporter of the idea that competition between companies brings lower prices and greater innovation, giving the consumer better, cheaper products to choose from. However, this is not always the case.

The battle for a new high-definition video-disc format is killing everyone. The consumers lose because there are 2 incompatible formats that do pretty much the exact same thing for about the exact same price, except the title availability isn't the same. So if I flip a coin, and go with HD-DVD I lose out on all the Pixar films I love. If I decide to switch over to Blu-Ray, I'll miss out on Paramount and Dreamworks films. And even if I drop the huge amount of money on a quality player from each camp, I'm still stuck when it comes to heading over to my friends' house: what player do they have? I might as well buy the DVD version of everything and forget about all of this high-falutin' high-def stuff.

Now here's where the companies lose too. By not collaborating on one format, they lose customers who either choose the other format, or neither.

Personally, I'll be waiting, along with most of the world, for a winner. If that winner never comes, we'll either see both formats die and be replaced altogether, or we will see high-def combo players become standard (to note, this would be fine by me, just as long as they get cheap soon).

For the time being, no one's happy, and it's all because the big studios were too busy worrying about this piracy thing that they keep telling us is killing their profits, to see that a new unified format is the only way to rake in money like DVD did.

November is Hip Hop History Month

2007-11-20T15:28:00.000-06:00

Now's the time to break out all your Run-DMC, Eric B & Rakim, KRS-ONE albums, and spin a James Brown break or two, all while poppin' and breakin' and watching your local graf crew bomb the city.

Let us all celebrate the four elements of hip hop this month...
1) Emceeing
2) DJing
3) Break dancing
4) Graffiti
...and remember those who have come before you.

Grab a copy of some of these fine documentaries: Style Wars, Freestyle, The Freshest Kids, Scratch

Bonus points for anyone who knows who that is in the picture, and why he's notable.

Cellphone surprise! (Solved!)

2007-11-13T10:03:00.000-06:00

It appears that it was not "Annie" they were saying but "Amy." Thankfully I know just who that Amy is. Mystery solved. Thanks, Ames (even if you're always 10 days late)!

Cellphone surprise!

2007-11-12T16:01:00.000-06:00

Most people just call someone when they want to wish them a happy birthday. Apparently I have a friend who decided that that was too mundane. For today I received a voice mail from India wishing me a happy birthday. It's 10 days late, but really, it was a great surprise. I wish I could somehow post the message here because it was great, but you can pretend to listen to it by visiting the website at TajTunes.com and read the greeting to yourself in your favorite Indian accent.

I couldn't tell who it was that sent me the message, but it sounded like they said "Annie." I don't know any Annies that would know my birthday, so it's a bit of a mystery. If you have any information on who this might have been, post it in the comments, I'd love to thank them.

I have a bunch of new co-workers!

2007-11-02T11:03:00.001-05:00

This was new co-worker 26453. He worked hard, but we had to kill him when he got too close. Let this be a warning to all of my other new co-workers. Except Paul, we'll let him live.

Halloween is serious business

2007-11-02T10:49:00.000-05:00

Because I can't stay away from my punk side, I dressed up again this year as a punk. You might remember me as being Elvis Costello a couple of years back. I went to WookieFoot's halloweeen show this year, and had myself a fine time rockin' out and checking out the amazing variety of costumes there.

Maybe next year I'll go as something post punk, so I can have a punk time line triptych.

Jerry Springer: The Opera

2007-10-06T22:38:00.000-05:00

This past Friday night, I went and saw the opening show of Jerry Springer: The Opera. It's an absurd, but interesting look at Jerry Springer, and the role he plays in our society. It deals with questions like: Is he to blame for our society, or is he a product of it? Does Satan watch TV? Is Jesus really just a big baby? As much as I enjoyed the story, I felt the rhythm of the lyrics felt choppy and forced.

However, don't let that dissuade you from going. The sets are fantastic, the singing is incredible, and the whole thing is just plain bizarre. So if you're in Minnesota, go ahead, indulge in local theater, just don't blame me if you come out of it having some sympathy for Jerry.

Grab tickets and find more info at the Minneapolis Musical Theater's web site.

Better Living Through Moustaches!

2007-09-28T09:19:00.001-05:00

Come, indulge yourself! Enjoy the delightfully witty repartee of two distinguished gentlemen, as they discuss important worldly topics. This is truly an insight into the razor sharp minds of
two well known men, Mr. Salt and Mr. Pepper. Behold: Better Living Through Moustaches.

I Want A New Blog

2007-09-14T10:42:00.000-05:00

One with no doubt
One that wont make me talk too much
Or make my face break out*

Well, I've got a new blog going along-side this one. It's a simple, fun, little thing that tracks the music and stuff looping through my head. It's called "The Phonological Loop."

Check it out.

*"I Want A New Drug" copyright Huey Lewis And The News

The thing that wouldn't die

2007-09-05T13:52:00.000-05:00

Cardboard friend differs from actual item

Last night I've come come to realize that the best of friendships never really die, they just take extended vacations in the remote jungles of apathy.

After 2 years of awkward silence between me and my best friend, we finally got back in touch with each other. But how does one come back and say, "hey, I don't really know why we stopped talking, but now we've got a gulf of time between us, wanna hang out?" It took me a long time to get up the courage to admit that I've got blame to carry for the falling out as well. When you feel like you've lost a best friend, it's easy to shift the blame elsewhere, and avoid taking the responsibility of re-making the connection. It's easy to fear that everything has changed and things will never be the same again.

However, when we got together to hang out, within the first minute I forgot about the years that had passed us by. It was like not a day had passed. Sure, there was some news that came as a surprise, but when it all comes down to it, neither of us has really changed in any fundamental way, despite all the growing up we've done. It's like an old lock and key. Even after years of use, my house key still works. Sure, the parts have been warn, and they don't look quite the same as they did when they were new, but it all fits together and I can still open that old door.

Houses are wonderful but difficult

2007-06-08T09:47:00.000-05:00

For a long time I've wanted a house of my own. I've been looking forward to all the great parts about owning your own house. You get to paint it as you please, you can install sound proofing and play your music as loud as you want, you get to make your living space as you want it. What I'd never thought about (and who does in their fantasies) was all the hard work and frustrations that go with owning a house. You've got to mow the lawn, keep a lot of space clean, fix or replace appliances when they break, and do everything else that is required to keep your house from being condemned and enjoyable to live in (or visit).

Over the last few years, my parents have been updating and fixing things in their house. It started with the desire for new flooring in the kitchen, and has culminated in a complete revamping of the entire house. Some of it is needed (thanks to certain poorly built walls), but most of it is redecorating. Although it's quite beautiful and rewarding when it's done, the long, frustrating hours my parents have had for the last year, as these most recent project have been going, have made me realize that even the fun stuff can be agonizing.

As much as I still look forward to someday buying my own house, I'm not so naive these days. At least I have an idea what I'm in for.

I've got Vertigo, and I love it

2007-05-30T10:04:00.000-05:00

Over the last 5 years I've become an avid comic book reader. What inspired it, I'm not sure, but I'd gone from a passing interest in X-Men (I mean, how cool is Wolverine), to religiously attending local comic book conventions. I generally stick to the stuff I pick up from the conventions, which consists of mostly local and independent artists.

However, over time, people have recommended, or I have stumbled upon, a few mainstream titles. Here's a list of some of the best:

Transmetropolitan
Fables
Preacher
Y: The Last Man
Lucifer
Sandman

For those who haven't already guessed, the running theme here is: they are all Veritgo titles. Vertigo is the more adult imprint of DC Comics. Instead of caped super heroes, you've got a lot of men and women, gods and creatures, many whom you might root for at one time and then hate at others. Characters that feel real, or at least more real than Superman.

If you're an adult who is looking to get into comics, I'd suggest picking up almost any title from Vertigo and giving it a read.

Blue man says "Keyboards are gross!"

2007-05-14T13:49:00.000-05:00

One of my coworkers took misophobia to the logical conclusion the other day. Rubber gloves are the perfect way to avoid the dirty, germy oils, dead skin flakes, food bits, and other unsavory menaces of the keyboard. Isn't he just adorable?
His wife must be so proud.

MicroCon 2007

2007-04-30T15:16:00.000-05:00

This Sunday I went to the Minnesota State Fair grounds to enjoy a nice time at MicroCon, a small, yearly, spring comic book convention. As always, it was a great time to talk with artists and see what's going on in their lives, and their art.

I always make a point to talk with some of my favorite artists at the conventions. These guys (and girl) are not only great artists and story tellers, but they are excellent people as well. Very rarely do I feel like being a fanboy about something, but it's just so exciting to me to be able to talk with a section of the usually inaccessible people who bring me a lot of joy. Here's a list of my favorite comic book artists who frequent Minnesota cons:

Sam Hiti (also check out Fist-A-Cuffs)
Zach Miller
Becky Grutzik & Matt Wendt
Zander Cannon, Kevin Cannon & Shad Petosky

If you've got any interest in comics (or art, for that matter), and haven't been to a comic book convention before, stop by the next con this fall. It's good way to go out and experience new art and ideas.

Remembering our history through samples

2007-03-06T16:45:00.000-06:00

Although some people believe that a piece of art is to be experienced on its own, I feel so much art is enhanced by understanding where it came from. Music has a very long history, and although much of it is inspired by other works and genres, a good portion of modern music is created with the help of sampling other works.

When done properly, this practice takes prior art and creates something new that goes beyond the original. A new work of art that brings older works into a new light. However, ignorance and carelessness can devalue an original work. Much as when forgetting a nation's history can devalue its current state of affairs.

In an effort to make others aware of where their music comes from, I've decided to share some interesting examples of a real history in samples.

Many people have heard the song "Doin' Time" by the group Sublime. Few have any of the music's origins. In the early 1930's George Gershwin wrote the music to the opera Porgy and Bess. In the opera there is a song entitled "Summertime." That piece was later arranged by Herbie Mann and recorded in 1961 during live performance at the Village Gate. This particular recording happened to be instrumental. Years later, Sublime sampled that recording and used their own lyrics. However, they pay homage to the original lyrics and begin with "Summertime and the livin's easy," which is how the original begins.

What is amazing about sampling is that it need not be limited to the original source to be sampled. If we begin with the groovy and rather repetitious song "Take Me To The Mardi Gras" as performed by Bob James (it was originally written by Paul Simon), we see the funky bell and drum groove that comprises most of the song appear in a number of hip hop tracks. One of the performers to sample this song is Run-DMC in their song "Peter Piper." Their DJ, Jam Master Jay, cut up the original on his turntables. Although well known by hip hop fans, "Peter Piper" has been generally forgotten by the public. A few years ago Missy Elliot released a song entitled "Work It." This song could be easily added to the list of songs that sampled "Take Me To The Mardi Gras," however, if one listens more closely one would notice that she didn't sample Bob James, but rather sampled some of the cuts that Jam Master Jay created for "Peter Piper."

Sometimes a song goes above and beyond a simple sample or loop. MC Hammer took the instrumental version of Rick James' "Super Freak" and laid his own lyrics over it. When I was a child my mom swore up and down that she'd heard "U Can't Touch This" years before, but couldn't place it. It wasn't until I was older that I heard "Super Freak" and realized that she wasn't crazy, she'd heard Rick James do his thing long before MC Hammer was rapping.

Knowing the history of the music I listen to not only gives me an appreciation for the original artists, but it adds new value to the new songs I hear as well as broadening my knowledge of music. So go ahead, enjoy that new song, but remember it has a history too. Perhaps one more intricate than you'd imagine.

Dead and Life.

2007-01-26T20:09:00.000-06:00

She died yesterday. My family has all gathered in Ohio. What's weird is that it has been so much more about life than about death. The only parts that hurt are when people wax nostolgic about her life. But the stories are fascinating.

In some ways I can't wait to leave, but in others I'm so happy to be here. The whole situation has made me appreciate my extended family in subtle, but significant ways. I can't find the words right now to explain, but I know it's there.

Death and dying.

2007-01-24T13:49:00.000-06:00

To note, I grew up without any grandparents. They had all died before I was born. Since then, very few people I've known have died. Those that have were old and their deaths did not come as much of a surprise. None of them I was close with. The one exception, well, I wouldn't have wished him dead, but let's say we didn't agree on much.

Recently, my father's cousin died. I hadn't seen her much, but the little I did left a positive, lasting impression on me. She was a fun lady, and relatively young to boot. But she had a bout with cancer and died shortly after the diagnosis. I've never known anyone who died from cancer. The near daily e-mail reports would come in. First she wasn't feeling well, then she started losing touch with reality. Then she was in a coma. It all happened so fast I thought she would pull out of it and regain her health somehow. But, instead, her living will dictated she not be given nutrients in this scenario. So she lasted a few days before her body finally gave out.

I understand now how families will wait and wait and wait on pulling the plug, just hoping that their relative will somehow wake up and pull through. I keep thinking, what if they'd given her more of a chance? Would she have ever come back?

Around the same time this was happening, we got reports from my own cousin that her mother's health was failing. We'd known for a while that this woman let her diabetes go for years, and was suffering from some of the consequences. It's hard to feel sorry for her when she was the only one stopping herself from getting help. However, this wasn't the only thing she'd been letting go.

It seems that she has been hiding breast cancer for 8 years. We're still trying to get our heads around that. On top of that, she'd never gone to see a doctor after her heart surgery years ago. Her heart was is poor condition since she did nothing to keep it healthy. So now we have 3 things killing her all at once. All either preventable, or reducible by her own means. It's very hard to feel bad for her.

On the other hand, she's my only aunt. She's been a stubborn woman that I've always had a bit of respect for. She never took crap from anybody, and she had a good eye for people. Sure, she's not always been the best person herself, or to herself, but as a close relative, it's been pretty easy to look past that. Now that woman is nearly gone from this world. She's been in a downward spiral for the last few weeks. Sure, there have been some bursts of vigor, but all in all it's been leading to one thing.

She's not dead yet, and if her past is any prediction, she probably won't die for a while. I can only hope she continues to be the stubborn old lady I've always known. Though I'd like to yell at her for being as stupid about her health as she has been, I really just want to hug her one last time. I want her to meet my girlfriend and give me some approval. I want her to be around for her grandkids so they can grow up knowing who their grandmother was.

It's all been hard on me, and I can't help but cry a little when I think about it. I guess this is part of the inevitable road one walks down in the path of life. Some day I will have to see my own parents go, and I can't bear to think about it. I hope by then I will have children of my own, who will have had a chance to meet their grandparents and learn about them firsthand. I hope we all feel like they had led long, fulfilling lives.

To my mom and my dad and my sister, I love you all.

Cleaning out my brain

2007-01-04T15:06:00.000-06:00

There's nothing more calming and rejuvenating to me than cleaning. It's a weird therapy. There's no meditating. No thinking about your problems. No Talking. Just you and your cleaning implement of choice (or necessity). Taking a damp cloth to all my shiny metal bits (faucets and mirrors) and polishing them up is my favorite part. That, or vacuuming lint off of the floor and watching the rug go from a spotted mess to a freshly groomed fully patch.

Sure, it seems pretty domestic and feminine, but in the privacy of your own home there's probably no one there to tell you you're a nancy. Unless, you know, you invite people over and dress in a French maid outfit. You know who you are.

Despite all of the therapeutic benefits I still find myself loathing to begin cleaning. I'll never understand this.

Hacking the boat.

2006-12-06T17:09:00.000-06:00

It has recently come to my attention that a certain university near me is lacking a bit of security on their public machines. All public machines use a single local admin account. Among other things, this means that for every student that doesn't clean up their mess, the next student on the computer can see everything they left behind.

What's interesting: no one seems to notice.

Having come from a university known for its school of computer science, I'm pretty aware of what can happen if an insecure system is left in the open. To combat some of the issues, my school forced all users to log into the public computers with their personal credentials. This meant that if you did something bad and didn't completely cover your tracks, they could easily see who it was who made the attack (unless you were smart enough to use someone else's account, but we'll ignore that scenario).

The insecure school in question isn't filled with geeks who get off on hacking into their buddies' computers. It's not filled with people who actively think about computers at all (unless you count mySpace, and facebook). So the question is this: do I bother bringing it up? They have some big vulnerabilities on the inside of their network, but there's no real threat.

The geek in me wants to do some grey-hat hacking and offer up the results to the administration, but the humanist in me doesn't want them to fix it if it isn't broken. Oh blogosphere, what should I do?

In the world of media it seems no one enjoys their content.

2006-06-27T10:07:00.000-05:00

If you know me, you know that I love music and own a rather large CD collection. I also have a much smaller collection of DVDs. If one looks at the plethora of ~~piñatas~~ portable media players on the market right now one would assume that by-golly, people everywhere must own lots of content as well. However, if one looks closely, one will notice it is nearly impossible to find a PMP with a hard drive of over 30GB. In fact, it's significantly more common to find only a 20GB HDD.

Personally, I have over 30GB in just music, and a few more with the few DVDs I've ripped. My theory is that people either don't have much content, or they choose not to enjoy it. If I'm wrong, then I think more companies besides Archos would be producing large-screen media players with 60GB+ HDDs.

So people, what is it? Do you not own any music or video, or do you buy a PMP to just not watch all of it? Or maybe we're all getting snubbed here. Maybe we would be happier with 80GB HDD PMPs. I know when I see a beautiful, sleek, feature-full player with good reviews I want to buy one, but not when it only comes in 20GB.

A word on licensing...

2006-06-14T17:15:00.000-05:00

Recently, I purchased a Microsoft Windows XP Professional Additional License Pack from some guy on eBay. Many things are sold on eBay, including lots of software. Thinking to myself, "hey this is a good price, and I already own installation media," I bought the pack. Now, using a perfectly good Windows XP Professional OEM installation media that I received with an OEM license I attempted to install Windows XP Pro on a second box. Instead of the two products playing nicely together I was informed that I had an invalid license key.

Here's something odd, there is no difference whatsoever between a full version of Windows XP Pro and a full version of Windows XP Pro OEM. There are no features missing or edited. The only difference is the EULA. One would think that it would be easy to attach a license key to a EULA and be done with it. But no, it seems that Microsoft needed to slightly modify the installation routine for each type of exactly the same Windows XP Pro such that only an OEM CD will work with an OEM key. This goes for volume licenses as well.

Would it not have been less expensive for Microsoft to just stamp out 1 version of the software and have the user agree to a different EULA depending on the license key they typed in? So now I'm stuck. I have a Windows XP Pro CD and a Windows XP Pro license, but I am unable to use them.

So I called Microsoft. I asked them, what are my options? Instead of saying, here's where you can buy a media-only edition to compliment your license, they told me that the guy who sold me the license was a...PIRATE! It turns out that not just anyone can sell an additional license. Their representative told me it was clearly stated "all over" their web site that one MUST purchase an additional license via Microsoft directly. I have yet to see this "clearly" marked anywhere. Please, someone, find out where it says this and contact me.

My attempt at going legit with my Windows has been a disaster. I'm now looking at finding a good deal on a FULL RETAIL BOX of Windows XP Pro. In the end I get screwed because Microsoft can't just have a simple licensing structure and implementation.

I've heard that Windows Vista will be one media fits all versions... but I wonder if one media will now fit all licenses. Wouldn't that be nice?

Photos!

2006-05-17T22:09:00.000-05:00

Come, enjoy my photos! Come see the wonderous sights I've seen! photos.halfbinary.net

The itch.

2006-04-18T14:57:00.000-05:00

After many months I'm getting the itch again. No, it's not a medical condition.

I want to start building scale models again. There, I said it. My problem I'm having is this: I can't stand painting inside, but I have no good place to paint outside. I'm not willing to forego painting my models, because I know how great they look with paint, and how satisfying it is.

For now, the itch remains. Maybe I'll even scratch it one of these days.

Apple, putting the cock in cocky...

2006-02-28T14:52:00.000-06:00

Well, today Apple had another announcement. All the Apple fanboys and a lot of us regular people got excited about what could be so great that Apple needed another mysterious conference. We watched and waited. And when it was over, we all sat there, stunned. But not because Apple actually brought out something amazing, but because they got a little too cocky for their own good.

Things that we were expecting:
-New video iPod
-Tablet Mac
-New Intel boxes

Things we got:
-New Intel box
-iPod boombox
-A leather sleeve

I will admit it, the new Mac Mini is hot. It's a pretty worthwhile thing to make an announcement about, but it doesn't nessecitate an event like this.

The iPod Hi-Fi is a huge boombox that puts your ipod up on top like a little phallis. Steve Jobs touted it as a replacement for your home stereo. He went as far as to say he's getting rid of his home stereo for this. Wait. It's a boombox. It's physically impossible to get good stereo separation from something with its speakers so close together, while keeping acoustic accuracy for differing room types. But he insists it's for audiophiles. Maybe as an expensive joke? Maybe he was tripping on acid during the presentation. We will never know, but we do know that he's wrong, and this silly system will not replace a good home stereo, and it's too big and heavy for real portability.

Apple's latest iPod acessory is $99. No, it's not anything electronic, it's a leather sleeve. Yes, it's $99 for a strip of nice, soft leather. Sure, it covers up your controls and really isn't terribly stylish, but someone thought it deserved a price tag much higher than any reasonable person would ever pay. There are many alternatives out there. Why would Jobs agree to sell this product? How could he have any self respect and go out there and say buy this?

Steve Jobs is cocky. He's always been cocky, but recently he's really gone into new territories of cockfulness. I mean, cockiness. Even the fanboys saw the Apple iThong they're selling and said, hey, this is too much. People are reporting Apple's stock fell immediately after the announcements. Oops.

News Flash: Microsoft Does Something, People Gripe!

2006-02-27T11:00:00.000-06:00

Hey everybody, it seems that Microsoft has released the lineup for their new OS, Vista. We've got 8 "flavours." People everywhere are griping about how Microsoft is ripping people off and confusing customers with all of these different editions. So you know what I'm talking about, here's a rundown of the 8 editions:

The ones that most people will ignore:
1. Windows Starter 2007 - for developing nations, I'm not kidding.
2. Windows Vista Home Basic N - "N" edition is for Europe, doesn't have media player. Sales of XP N edition have proven that no one will buy this.
3. Windows Vista Business N - see above, but for businesses.

The ones businesses will want:
4. Windows Vista Business - Has usual array of configuration and permissions tools for businesses
5. Windows Vista Enterprise - Like business, but has fancy things like encryption and UNIX app compatibility.

The ones that real, actual consumers will care a about:
6. Windows Vista Home Basic - A trimmed down version for people who want the upgrade, but don't have lot of money or a fancy computer.
7. Windows Vista Home Premium - All the fancy bits that the majority of people who will care about upgrading will want, including media center and tablet functionality.
8. Windows Vista Ultimate - This is everything in one. It's got all the fancy bits from all the different editions we care about (though I'm unsure if the Enterprise parts will be there).

As you can see, there's only 3 editions that people will even bother to look at. Now, your average consumer doesn't bother actually upgrading their OS: they buy a new computer. I can see 90% of new computers being shipping with Home Premium, since it'll have the new Aero interface everyone is so excited about. Customers won't have to choose, it'll just be there. For those who want to upgrade, their choices really aren't any different than they are now. For some, they will actually have an easier time choosing.

To explain, here's what Microsoft currenty offers for people:

Windows XP Home
Windows XP Media Center Edition
Windows XP Tablet Edition
Windows XP Professional

Wait, is that FOUR?! So it is. And to make matters worse, if you desire the Media Center functionality, you would currently have to sacrifice the luxuries of Professional edition. Microsoft has combined MCE and Tablet into their Vista Home Premium edition, and if you want to add Pro features to it, you get Vista Ultimate.

So now consumers' decisions are clear: do they care about Media Center functionality or tablet functionality? If not, buy Home Basic. Do they care about having fancy permissions and remote entry to their computer? If not, buy Home Premium. If they want it all, just buy Ultimate.

Why is everyone griping?

Maybe I should "masturbate" more often...

2006-02-27T10:55:00.000-06:00

It's been a long while since I last posted here, but you didn't miss out on anything. I could have told you all about how I worked a lot a couple of weeks ago, or how I had dinner out a few times, but really, no one wants to hear about that.

However, I'm hoping to add to this blog more frequently by discussing - or more likely yammering - about my views on what's going on in the world. ...at least the stuff that I find important.

Yeah, look out for more masturbatory ramblings on technology.

The legend himself...

2005-11-15T23:21:00.000-06:00

Looks like Ron Jeremy is coming to town! Wait, what? He's here as part of the International Sex and So Much More Show. I'm tempted to go just to see him. I'll post more if I go.

Edit: I didn't end up going. Sorry guys.

Blogs are masturbatory.

2005-11-06T21:31:00.000-06:00

Okay, I think I've figured out why I've never been able to hold on to a blog. I can't stand just yapping on about myself. I dunno how long this one will last. But I'll give it a try.

For all those people out there who think I should have one: pray for me!

The birthday celebration!

2005-11-06T21:23:00.000-06:00

This weekend I gathered my best buddies around and had myself a fine birthday party. DW drove into town and joined us. Love that boy! He's such a dedicated friend.

The party was great. We played Pit. For thoes of you who don't know, Pit is a rather simple game that's about 6 billion years old. And by 6 billion I mean 100. Drinks were had and laughter was made. So was cake. And dinner. And dessert. Great foods, great friends. And people seemed to like my music selection as well.

Can't say it was the longest of parties, but it was fun while it lasted. I can't wait until my next excuse to host a party!

Late Hollow Weenie post...

2005-11-04T01:52:00.000-06:00

I was Elvis Costello. Note the yellow-tinted glasses.

Cleaning party!

2005-11-03T23:24:00.000-06:00

I just got done cleaning for the night. 2 of my dearest friends helped. Yes, that's right, I enslaved 2 of my closest friends. But they do get to enjoy their handiwork when I have my party.

I wish I could say I was really done cleaning. If I were a superhero my one weakness would be paper. I've got so many paystubs and bills and crap piling up and I've got no idea what to do with it all. I've either got to throw more of it away, or I've got to get me a much bigger filing cabinet.

But beyond all that crap I've got my modeling stuff. That's the real problem. For a while I was really, really into scale modeling. In my fervor I collected a lot of stuff. a lot of difficult to pack away and or throw away stuff. I've got half-used paint jars. I've got parts lying about; an unfinished model collecting dust. Parts strewn about, needing a plastic home. What concerns me is: will the urge come back? Will winter set upon the world again and I shall be drawn to my paints and glue? Or am I done? Should I sell my collection, and discard my half-used paints and thinners? I wish I knew for certain. I've got to move in less than a month and it needs to be dealt with. Help!

Working can be fun!

2005-10-24T23:51:00.000-05:00

Here's to a 13 hour day at work! No lunch, no breaks (except for dinner, but that didn't count in my 13 hours). We've got a build tomorrow morning and lo and behold, things took longer than I'd hoped.

On the other hand, I had a really good time doing it. There's a universal joy in accomplishing something on your own. I made a lot of progress and made sure things were neat and tidy. It's a great feeling. Though I'm quite exhausted right now. That said: good night.

Shifting planes

2005-10-17T17:34:00.000-05:00

Despite enjoying having the delicious ammount of space I currently have in my apartment, I've decided to move to a one bedroom. Thankfully, the move itself shouldn't be too terrible. I will be merely moving up one floor.

The layout looks nice and things look clean. It seems as though there are far too many cable outlets in the place, but I'm not one to complain about that. I'm more worried about switching all of my services and mail to a new address.

This probably means that I will have another house-warming party. Really, there's no good reason, but it's an excuse to have a party.

Back from the down there...

2005-10-17T14:52:00.000-05:00

Well, as it turns out, Iowa really is pretty dull. But I do hve some highlights to share with you, my beloved readers.

There is a restaurant in Decorah, IA that has a burrito called "Mr. King." Now, I know there are places that advertise how huge their burritos are, but this place doesn't even give you a warning. No, the name suggests that perhaps this is a well stuffed bit o burrito, but it does not prepare you for the actual arrival of the meal.

The burrito is comical. It's a novelty sized burrito. Really. I wish I'd taken a picture of it. It's about a foot long and about 6 inches in diameter. Lordy, it was massive. But it was also tastey and gave me the joy of leftovers.

Since it's the beginning of fall I got to see the beautiful sights that small, midwestern towns provide. The bunches of multicolored trees were quite beautiful. That's why I love fall. And the crisp, fresh air. Mmm...

The biggest downside was the fact that if I'd wanted to purchase any amenaties I'd pretty mcuh be forced to shop at Walmart. Thankfully I didn't need to support that establishment during my stay.

Goin' down ta Iowa!

2005-10-15T10:09:00.000-05:00

Today I'm heading down to Iowa to visit my buddy the Yone Bone. Yes, it's Iowa. Yes, there's reportedly nothing to do there. But I've heard the bowling and beer are cheap. Yesh, I plan to bowl and booze it up this weekend. But I'm going to try not to mix the two... wouldn't want to hurt my game.

But seriously folks, I'm not actually planning to become a drunkard this weekend. I'm really much more interested in seeing my friend. I look forward to hanging out with him again, albeit for a short while.

I shall report on the goings on after this weekend. For now, I must get my drive on!

Maybe I'll really use this...

2005-09-20T14:15:00.000-05:00

Maybe I'll just let this go by the wayside as usual. We shall see!